There is no chocolate in this house.

This is a bad thing.

Oh sure, when I go shopping I say, “No, if I have chocolate in the house, I’ll eat it. By not purchasing chocolate, I shall cleverly avoid its consumption.”

Which is all well and good, except on those days when you really would like a bit of chocolate, and have none, and slowly go stir crazy, because damn it, you’re not going to break down and walk across the street to the depanneur.