Today I felt like I was racing to get nowhere. I hate those kind of days.
I spent the last three hours working, yes, honest to goodness working. I updated that proposal and sent it off (according to my notes I last submitted it in August of 2004 — yikes), and tried to write two more.
And wow, did it ever hurt. I’m so out of practice. Even looking at my old ones, I floundered for ideas and wrote in a stilted, rusty, hollow-sounding fashion instead of the exciting and dynamic style required. A proposal is part outline, part marketing selling tool, and the marketing bit has totally flown away from me over the past two years. My brain hurt (no, really, I needed to take Tylenol), and I wasn’t looking forward to orchestra.
Imagine my surprise when I was called at six to be told that orchestra was cancelled, as our rehearsal venue is unavailable and no one told us ahead of time. This is bad, because we only have a few rehearsals left before July 1, but also a relief, because as a result of struggling with proposals I’m nowhere near the headspace orchestra requires. So because I didn’t get a chance to go out and pick up a few things this afternoon (the proposals took twice as long as I’d expected them to — ah, optimism), I’m heading out now instead.
“Doesn’t matter if you suck just play and play and play.”
– Invisible, ‘Poor Dee Dee’
The point is that you worked. Sure, you’re rusty. But you worked.
Go, you.
OYT
You know, the only instrument I’ve ever been able to play well at all is the radio, so I admire that even through a headache, you still have a spirit and passion to want to rehearse. I’d so be lollygagging by now. Congrats on your achievements lately, no matter how small they may seem, in the end they will be huge.
I’d be eager to read over ‘Swan Sister’ for you when it gets close to completion, if you’re looking for “beta” readers. Sounds very intriguing.