(Background: There is homemade macaroni and cheese baking in the oven. Apologies in advance to anyone who enjoys ketchup with their mac and cheese, or with anything else; you’re welcome to it, but the idea of consuming it on anything other than fries or burgers and hot dogs ourselves makes us shudder.)

SPARKY: [on his way to the bathroom] You know what I love?

MAMA: [from her office] What?

SPARKY: Macaroni and cheeeeeese.

MAMA: Good, ’cause that’s what we’re having for dinner.

SPARKY: [in bathroom] You know what else I love?

MAMA: What?

SPARKY: Ketchup!

[There is a pause.]

HRH: [from the living room] No. Oh, no.

MAMA: You do know that those things don’t go together, right?

SPARKY: Why not?

HRH: Because you’re not. that. person.

SPARKY: [gaily] You’re right! I’m not! Hahahahaha!

And he proceeded to laugh loudly as if he’d set the whole thing up, and it sounded like he was the laugh track for a bad sitcom. We laughed so hard we cried in our respective rooms.

But the really weird thing? He doesn’t particularly like ketchup.