Category Archives: Food

Family Visit, Virginia Woolf, Brief Miracles

We had glorious weather all weekend in Oakville until a wonderful thunderstorm during Sunday dinner (mmm, rack of lamb). I saw my grandmother from the west coast, old family friends, and all in all enjoyed a lovely trip. I wish we could have spent another day or so with my parents, but both my husband and I have to work today.

I managed to get a thousand words or so written on Saturday afternoon, too. I’d been dithering about a chapter in the Great Canadian Novel, unsure about how to handle the next step (or, rather, to choose what the next step should be from a pool of four different events). I plunged in and finished the chapter, and even started the next one.

And then, I crashed. Why, you ask? I picked up a secondhand hardcover copy of Michael Cunningham’s The Hours. When I read work like this, I wonder why I even bother. (Yes, yes, I know: different styles, all kinds to make a world, different tastes in readership, blah blah blah. I’m sharing. Be quiet.) I despair of ever becoming capable of painting word and thought, of arranging language to convey a depth of emotion with only a few words.

I’ve read scraps of Virginia Woolf’s journals, and she too uses sparse language, and yet conveys something so much larger than what the words say. Is that what genius is? Everything I read of mine seems mawkish and heavy-handed (though not as heavy-handed as some of the published stuff I’ve read, thank all the gods), no longer as airy and bright as it seemed when I set it down. I’ve ordered a copy of Woolf’s journal so I can read the whole thing, not to further depress myself, but to try to understand how it is that she manages to succeed at what she does, even in her own private notes.

When I moved I found a humour coloumn that I’d clipped from the English department newsletter during my BA. It’s an “Ask Your Author Agony Column”.

Dear Author:
Lately I’ve been feeling that my life has no meaning. What should I do?
Signed, Pondering the Meaning

There are several witty samples of what various authors might have responded (“Get your archetypes straightened out,” recommends Robertson Davies), but here’s Virginia Woolf’s imagined response:


Life is just a series of brief miracles. Stay away from water
and for heaven’s sakes get a room of your own.
– Virginia Woolf.

Life’s just a series of brief miracles. This comment was meant to be fun, but it says something important. Juxtaposing the words “just”, “brief” and “miracle” creates a tension that Woolf’s work displays as well. How can something be “just” a miracle? Is it a miracle because it’s brief? Shouldn’t miracles, by definition, be life-changing? Or is it our observation of the miracle and how we choose to be changed by it that defines it as brief or enduring? If they’re brief, is it the knowledge that life is made up of miracles that keeps us going?

More people should see the miracles around them, however brief. And more people should remember that life is a series of miracles; we just have to find them.

Out Of It

The four-legs are tearing around like mad things this morning. Major spring/cabin fever, apparently. They’re not quite making the turns in the kitchen and they’re bashing into each other, which is rather amusing.

I’m out of it and dizzy today. So out of it, in fact, that I tried to reheat three slices of pizza in the oven for lunch, and baked them to a crisp. Convinced that I evidently shouldn’t try to assemble anything to eat that required heat or sharp objects somewhere in the process of preparation, I scanned my fridge and my pantry without success. Then I saw the bowl of apples and decided to have one. The first bite convinced me that I had wanted an apple all along and the lack of culinary focus was in fact a godsend.

Go figure.

Sidetrack

I went out to pick up cat food yesterday and came home with fresh challah.

Mmm. Challah. Lightly toasted with lashings of butter, melting all over the fingers.

Mmm.

Oh, I picked up cat food too, because my feline companions don�t appear to appreciate challah the way I do. Butter, yes; challah, no. Philistines.

Back On Track

One of the things we have to get used to now in this new kitchen is the electric stove. After using gas for two years, it’s quite the adjustment. This is a brand-new stove, too, so it makes little pops and groans as we break it in, so to speak. It’s fiercely hot, although it takes a while to get there, unlike our previous gas stove, which was poof! hot as soon as you turned it on. Some day I will learn to only bake a single sheet of cookies when I’m trying out a new oven, so I don’t ruin two whole sheets of cookie dough.

The rest were just peachy, though. Mmm.

I’ve been reading up a storm this past week – it’s one way to escape the semi-chaos that still exists around here. (Mind you, ‘chaos’ to us means that we don’t have things up on the walls yet.) I’ve read Robin Hobb’s Golden Fool, which was even better than The Tawny Man; Jenna Starborn by Sharon Shinn, which is billed as a space opera and gothic romance retelling of Jane Eyre; Shatterglass, the final book in a YA fantasy tetrology by Tamora Pierce; and I’ve just reread Silver RavenWolf’s Beneath a Mountain Moon as well. None of them even made it to the “Currently Reading” table at the right. It might have had something to do with my reluctance to sit down at my computer, as overwhelmed as the desk was with piles of stuff as we sorted through boxes.

Speaking of which – all my books are now unpacked! Huzzah! I’ve had to double up all the bottom shelves, which means that a third of my books are hidden behind another row, but tha’s what you get for giving away a bookshelf just before the move. I’m fairly certain that I know where everything is now. (Fairly certain. Not positive, but fairly certain.)

The antibiotics proceed to drag me back from the brink of heart-rending, dramatic death. All hail Pfizer and their 7$-a-tablet pills!

On the work front, it looks like I might have a freelance editing contract for a privately published history, which will be nice; I have to sit down and think about how long it will take me to smooth out, copyedit and generally proofread a 100 page document in order to have a final figure to submit for the proposed budget. If there’s something I hate almost as much as deciding on how much my time is worth, it’s gauging how long it’s going to take me. At least after all that soul-searching a month or so ago, I had a ready answer when I was asked what my rates were.

We’re headed over to the South Shore tonight to my in-laws’ place for dinner, and then the Brier final on a glorious big screen TV. This is good, because the only channel we receive on our TV right now is CBC, and it’s really grainy. I’d rather not have to try to figure out who’s who during a bonspiel like this!

So, slowly but surely, things are getting back on track. I’m feeling more human than I have felt in quite some time now, which is a good thing, no?

Christmas At Home

Well, we woke up on Christmas morning to over ten centimeters of snow, so I feel right at home. The drive from Montreal to Toronto was surprisingly good, which should have alerted us right off the bat that a bad storm was looming. (The drive was made infinitely more exciting by four or five unmarked mix tapes donated by Tass, including a seasonal compilation marked only ‘Here I am — Rock Me Like A Candy Cane’, which featured the inimitable juxtaposition of the thrash metal rendition of Silent Night with the innocent Christmas Scat from The Muppet Christmas Carol.) After a dull brown December, though, seeing drifts of white everywhere on Christmas morning is rather aesthetically pleasing. The Weather Channel assures us that the 8 degrees C on Monday and Tuesday will take care of things, much to the grim pleasure of the Torontonians.

I love Christmas with my family; there’s always what amounts to a library under the tree, hidden by pretty paper and sparkly ribbon. The tree this year is a surprisingly effective six foot tall fig tree, wrapped with a single strand of white fairy lights, since their seven-month-old Maine Coon Cat is still at the shiny-things stage. (Despite this clever attempt to protect all things Christmas-y, he tried to climb the fig on Christmas morning, because he could see his new foam rubber ball nestled in the leaves.) As for what kind of library was under said tree, my parents each received three or four books, and this year my husband tore the wrapping off The Art of The Fellowship of the Ring, the hardcover volume of developmental art that he discovered in a bookshop not long ago, which kept him busy for well over an hour. I received both books written on the fiftieth anniversary of the Stratford Festival that I had wanted, as well as the recently released Glenn Gould: A Life in Pictures and the new Anne Rice in hardcover, to offset all of that high-brow Canadian culture. Plenty of chocolate and a new polar fleece dressing gown rounded out my major gains. I’m set for the rest of the winter, now.

The snow was still flying out there when we went to bed, and weatherpersons were predicting a final day’s total accumulation of around twenty-five centimeters. I’m glad; there’s something just odd about a Christmas with no snow. Oh, sure, I’ve had my share of snowstorms in Montreal this fall, throughout November and the early part of December, but I don’t think I could ever live somewhere where it doesn’t actually snow at Christmas. I know, I know, there will be plenty of the stuff throughout January and February. I will be thoroughly sick of it by the time March rolls around. Just think, though, about the quality of light that snow creates. One of the reasons November is usually so dull is because it’s overcast and the bright green of the leaves and grass has faded through rusts to browns. The overall effect is rather depressing. As soon as it snows, though, the light is brighter, refracting through millions of individual snowflakes, bouncing around and creating a warmer, clearer glow.

We still have to brush it off cars, and wade through it to get to the bus stop, and jam hats down over our hair to protect our ears from blowing ice and wind. I know. Overall, though, it’s not so bad. It’s the dampness that creeps into your bones and makes you miserable. There’s a difference, after all. If it would just snow for a week leading up to Christmas, then stop, I’d be happy…

Yule Party!

Woo!

Just back from the office Yule party. If I’d known that red wine would make me feel this good, I’d have started drinking it at eleven o’clock this morning when I started feeling really ill.

Seriously, though, my short Christmas Special Return to Retail — For A Limited Time Only! — was made a lot easier by my stellar boss and coworkers. (Okay, the easy-going clients were a significant factor as well. No one was freaking out this Christmas, which was good to see. I was worried; after all, part of the reason I burned out after eleven years of retail had to do with the needy clients, who were in remarkable scarcity this past week, thank goodness.) Tonight’s party, spent in the company of my colleagues, was incredibly enjoyable, even taking my rebellious stomach into account. My only regret is that I didn’t dare eat anything for fear it wouldn’t stay down; the buffet looked amazing, especially the desserts. Denied the solid food, I started off by drinking 7-Up, and flung caution to the wind after my second glass. If I was going to be sick anyway, I might as well choose to be sick in style. Oddly enough, the wine seems to have settled my stomach. It has also, however, gone right to my head, since I’ve had nothing to eat today.

Oh, well. Might as well enjoy it while it lasts.

Renewed

Yesterday, quite simply, sucked.

Oh, the day was horrid. Evil was afoot in my life. Things went from bad to worse.

I did not blog, I did not write; I did not practice. I did, however, buy funky new shoes.

I shall not depress you all, however, with gloomy details. Instead, rejoice, for today was a wondrous day!

Highlights include an hour and a half of brilliant cello, where I spiked that irritating Handel quite nicely, thank you very much; a terrific wrap sandwich made with thick slices of ham roast and Monterey Jack cheese, toasted under the broiler; leaps and bounds of progress on freelance work; and a satisfying few thousand words added to my novel count.

A rest is as good as a change. Voila. I am renewed.

And I have new funky shoes. Go me!