Category Archives: Writing

Work!

It feels good to be working again. Today, I:

– got the galley proofs for the hearthcraft book coming out in April (due back January 13th)

– got my first freelance evaluation assignment of the year (due back January 12)

– and wrote!

Orchestrated:
New words today: 3,376
Total word count, Orchestrated: 58,625

And it feels very good indeed. Today I wrote the crucial Bad Thing and started the fallout from it. Muah-hah. Doesn’t feel like much of a climax at the moment, but that’s probably because I’m too close to it and it’s been building for some time. Also, first draft, so no pressure.

So yes, good thing I got a chunk of Orchestrated written today, because I’m probably not going to be able to do much about it for the rest of the week.

2008 In Review

Things I Did In 2008 That I Have Never Done Before:

– finished, submitted, and handled the edits on my fifth book (there is only one fifth!)
– received only SIX edits/queries on that book
– took up cello lessons for the second time, after a ten-year hiatus (there is only one second time!)
– knitted not one but THREE complete objects
– wrote a synopsis and outline for a YA novel in one afternoon
– then pretty much finished writing that YA novel within six months once I started
– joined not one but two social networking/contact sites (Facebook and Ravelry, to add to last year’s Shelfari and Last.fm)
– started shopping for a new cello, something that is going to take me years to do before I find The One
– voluntarily left my former luthier and moved to a new one, with whose services I am very happy indeed
– headlined a Pagan festival as a special guest along with Serena Fox of Circle Sanctuary and presented a workshop on an intro to hearthcraft
– adopted a kitten from the Animal Rescue Network (that’s for the ARN thing, because I have certainly adopted kittens before)
– baked my own bread for an entire year (thirteen months if we count from when I started, which was November 2007)
– gave a guest lecture at the university level
– made a specific trip to meet someone I met via the Internet
– performed a handfasting for two of my dearest friends (yes, I’ve done a legal wedding, but this was a purely spiritual ceremony)
– performed a baby naming/blessing ceremony for another set of dearest friends, the subject of the ceremony being my second godsdaughter
– stopped using shampoo entirely (having a baby did wacky things to my body chemistry, and while some things were good, the uber-sensitivity my scalp developed to sodium laurel/laureth sulfate was the worst; I now use a silicone-free mild conditioner with the occasional baking soda/water mix instead, and my hair is happier, too)

Things I Did in 2008 That I Am Proud Of:

All of the above, plus:

– performing in my second “public” cello recital ever (“public” is in quotation marks because it was for a bunch of people I don’t know, but was in a private venue)
– cutting my hair to above-shoulder length after having it very long for years and years
– joining a new RPG for the first time in, um, a number of years that I do not remember
– teaching myself a new hobby/skill (knitting!)

Good Things About 2008:

– meeting Bodhifox in person at the Fearsranch and proving beyond any doubt that he is a kindred spirit
– the boy being accepted part-time into a wonderful preschool (and subsequently coming home counting in French, singing songs I have not taught him, and bearing lots of art not proposed or initiated by me!)
– discovering the novels of Barbara Cleverly
– joining the local library, thereby cutting down my book purchasing
– the loan of the Mystery Cello from my cousin, the turn of the century German cello that requires about 5K$ worth of repair before it is restored to a playable state
– meeting Brendan Myers and having dinner in Old Montreal with him and other like-minded souls
– meeting Serena Fox at the Hamilton PPD 2008
– a fabulous co-coven spiritual retreat at Samhain, so awesome that there are now three planned per year instead of one
– the resolution of the ongoing tension with the unbalanced downstairs neighbour: She voluntarily moved out! The entire building is much, much happier and more secure
– a lot of spending has been curtailed/refined/refocused: We make all our own bread and take-out has returned to a real once-in-a-while special treat
– a good crop of veggies harvested from the garden (not enough to last the winter — not even half a month, actually, but the thought is there)
– being diagnosed with fibromyalgia (you may think that would be a Bad Thing, but having that diagnosis was a very good thing because it clarified so much, gave me a plan for dealing with it, and allowed me to move forward)
– adopting Gryffindor and seeing him and the boy romp together
– two dear friends giving birth to lovely little girls!

Like last year I’m sure there’s more, of course; a lot of this year was good. But these are what stand out in my memory. Possibly more than anything else I am more thankful for my friends, appreciative of them and their strengths, proud of their accomplishments and successes, and love spending time with them. This is light-years beyond my enochlophobia and agoraphobia of previous years. I’ve become a lot more comfortable with myself, and trust myself more. I’ve also further refined my stop-spending-time-with-people-who-drain-me technique, with excellent benefits to my psyche and physical health.

Not-So-Good Things About 2008:

– my very dearest and oldest cat Maggie went to the Summerlands after seventeen years of love and companionship
– the pregnancy book was cut from the fall publishing lists and is on hold indefinitely
– losing Emru to leukaemia
– learning that the repairs of the Mystery Cello would require over 5K$, which shelved the project indefinitely
– ongoing financial balancing (the credit line is still looming over us, but everything else is okay)

How Did I Do With My 2008 Wishes?

– Rediscover my CD collection

Er, well. At least I didn’t bring a whole bunch of new ones into the house and ignore the old ones. This year everything kind of languished. I’d cull except every time I look at the CDs to sort through them I remember exactly what’s on each one and know that I might want to listen to it someday. Argh. My CD buying has really, really dropped off sharply in the past few years because I don’t hang out in music stores any more, nor do I go see movies and become enchanted by their scores.

– Make time for practising my spirituality in a more aware fashion

Not so much. It’s not that I’ve lost what I had, just that I did want to make a specific effort to do more things with awareness, and I didn’t get there.

– Make a stronger commitment to practising the cello

We have a winner! I mean really, how much more serious does it get? I’m taking lessons again after a ten-year hiatus, and still sitting second chair in orchestra. I am very, very proud of this particular resolution and how it has manifested.

– Let up on the second-guessing of the decisions I make, and the self-doubt I feel about my work

Still chipping away at this one, but it’s going to be an ongoing thing till the end of my life. I do feel a lot more confident about my ability in general, but I still have those slippery moments of Oh gods this sucks and why am I trying? I’m trying because it’s a first draft, and the subtlety can be woven in later.

– Remember frequently that I am a wonderful, kind, talented person

Not sure about this one. I got a lot better at saying If someone has a problem with this/that, then that’s their issue, which kind of connects to this wish because I don’t expend as much energy worried about what people think of me. I have definitely gotten better at telling myself that I or what I do is cool when it is. I still can’t accept a compliment gracefully, and I still dismiss too much of what people say about me when it’s nice things. I am getting better at being happy and/or satisfied with myself and I what I do, though.

– Focus my time so that I don’t waste as much of it

Lists have been my very best friend this year. Learning how to say no now that I understand how to manage my energy thanks to the fibro has helped immensely, too.

– Take up formal study of another spiritual path to complement the ones I already practise

Yes, but not in the way I’d expected/planned to go. This ended up being a focus on Germanic spirituality instead of Druidism. There’s time enough for it all in my life.

– Take care of my body so that the chronic pain thing doesn’t negatively impact my life, as it’s beginning to once again (I’m hoping it’s the damp and the cold that’s made it increasingly bad over the past month)

Another winner! Having a firm medical diagnosis of fibromyalgia went a long, long way to understanding how my body was working and how to deal with it.

Wishes for 2009:

– Further refine and develop my cello skills
– Finish and polish and start querying Orchestrated
– Keep on writing
– Start making all our own pasta
– Plant, harvest, and preserve more vegetables from the garden
– Save more money (I did end 2008 with a nice balance in the bank but it’s earmarked for cello stuff in the future, and while it sits there it collects interest, hurrah!)

========

If I had to assign a value to 2008, I’d say that again, it’s been an overall good year. Looking back at 2007 I see that I didn’t note much about how tense it was financially for us and how much of an effect that had on our day to day life and relationships within the family. That stress was much less present this year, and HRH and I have done a lot of repair on our own relationship. Things are certainly better than they were last year, for which I am very, very thankful. In 2007 my default mood was frustrated and tense; in 2008 I learned to let that go, both through the understanding that stressing just creates more stress, and as a result of things getting better job-wise for HRH and the general financial situation easing. Of course, with the market plunging as it is and the publishing industry closing doors and freaking out quietly behind them, I will likely not sell another book for a few years, but my freelance work keeps a steady trickle coming in.

May 2009 be even better for us all!

Going In Circles

Today’s agenda included going to two yarn shops, one in the morning and one after the boy’s nap (different opening hours on New Year’s Eve day, you see).

This morning’s mission: A success! I picked up a skein of the Berroco Softwist in Ginger, and found a substitute for the discontinued Jasper in the Berroco Ultra Alpaca, which is slightly heavier and has twice as much in the skein (a good thing because I’m going to knit this hat with a double-strand of both yarns) although it lacks the pretty sheen the Softwist has. It’s still a gorgeous yarn and will look lovely with the Softwist; I’m looking forward to knitting with it. I picked up a new size 10 circular needle to start it, too, as my current one is being used for HRH’s scarf. Came home, opened the twisted skeins, wound them into balls (from both ends, so I have two balls of each), much to the interest of Nixie and Gryff, who behaved themselves impeccably (except for that one swipe made by Gryff, for which he apologised).

Put the boy to bed for his nap. Came out, rubbing my hands together with glee. Now, to cast on! I bet I can get a good third of the hat done before the boy wakes up! Bodhifox needs this hat before spring comes!

I bought the wrong length circular needle. It’s a 24″ cable, not a 16″.

*facepalm*

So… all that, and I still can’t knit till the boy wakes up and HRH returns with the car from his errand. I could try sliding the stitches off the scarf’s circular needle and onto straight needles to liberate the circular size I require, but I suspect I will only make a hash of it and create more stress that I don’t need.

If I’d picked up the ball of correct-dyelot Jo Sharp that I saw while I was at the first yarn shop I could be knitting the second half of my black scarf right now. Or a skein of grey super chunky wool to start a slipper. But I didn’t, because I wanted to get them at Ariadne.

Augh. Lesson learned: Buy it where you see it.

I will write instead. Mutter, grumble, and grr.

On the positive side of things, I can now successfully and reliably purl. Go me!

Grumpy

So there’s been all sorts of lovely things happening lately, but some disappointments too. Such as today, when the boy woke up with a hacking, barking cough, which was enough to send HRH to the phone to cancel our much-anticipated trip out to t! and Jan’s place for the day.

I love my boys, I truly do. But I’m used to them being gone for most of the week, and they’ve been home for a full seven days now. This plus all the holidaying has drained me pretty badly, and I’m turning into the Irritable Me that I’m not so fond of because I haven’t had any time to myself. I have an outing planned for myself tomorrow, which will help.

The boys are currently watching Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (which has been renamed as “The Hogwarts Express” by Liam) on the new TV and the boy was just dancing with excitement in the middle of the room, riveted by the Sorting Hat sequence. He jumped and cheered when Harry was sorted into Gryffindor house. “Gryffindor! Just like me!” he exclaimed. He’s enchanted (no pun intended) by the characters and the settings. I suspect that he doesn’t remember the first time we watched it with him in the room a couple of years ago. We’re currently reading the Magic Tree House series before bedtime, but seeing how much he’s loving the Potter universe I may try reading him the first book soonish. I suspect I’ll be making him a Gryffindor scarf as well, which would thrill him to no end because not only will he have a Hogwarts scarf, he will match his Da.

I suppose I will go sit with them and knit, since I can’t focus on work when the boy is running in and out of my office. I managed to get about nine hundred words of Orchestrated written yesterday while he napped, which cheered me up a lot, but there’ still lots of work I want done by the end of the year. I have a pile of cello work to do as well at some point. If the office downstairs is empty I may go down there in a bit to practise.

Orchestrated Update

New words today: 1,932
Total word count, Orchestrated: 54,058

If I’d known how close I was to 2K for the day I’d have written another seventy words.

And right before the two days to myself that I’d scheduled for writing, I’ve been handed another freelance assignment. At least this one is short and should hopefully be done in a day. I’d be more upset if I hadn’t worked on Orchestrated today while the boy watched Wall*E for the fourth time in two days.

Success!

Another freelance assignment turned in! Once it’s approved, I can invoice for it and the previous one and the cheque may arrive before Christmas. Every little bit helps. Of course, we are generally in need of money just as my cheques come in, so my little bit goes toward a bill instead of into my 7/8 cello fund, but still.

And now, I will go knit. Yes, I should write. In fact I’m going to post a brief update on the writing community I’m in first. But I am fed up with the computer thing, so knitting it will be. I probably can’t handle purling at the moment, though, so I shall cast on Mousme’s Hat v2.0!

Hmm. I seem to have missed posting my month-end book roundup. Tomorrow.

Oh, For The Love Of Euterpe and Calliope…

I just crashed through a huge, thick wall of writer’s block and made a freaking enormous discovery.

Harpsichord Dreams is not one but *two* different music-essay/narrative non-fiction books. Specifically: one about the function of music in my life, and one about my life with cello.

This is both good and bad. On the one hand, it opens up an entirely new avenue to explore, down which my mind and fingers are already racing (holy sudden wordcount, Batman). On the other hand, it means I have yet another project to add to the roster, yet another unruly child to discipline and manage and feed.

For now I’m going to keep them under the same rubric and classify them as the same book/project. Very soon I’ll have to split the file in two, though. I don’t want to because it will feel like hacking half of Harpsichord Dreams away and the resulting total word count will make me sad. Maybe I’ll rename it, something like “The Narrative Non-Fiction Music Duology” and report the word count of each, then report a combined total word count. Anything to avoid sending my writer-self into morose despair. I mean, of course I know the words are all still there but just in two places instead of one. It’s like having two ten-dollar bills instead of a twenty-dollar bill. My writer-self, however, like most other writer-selves, is easily dismayed and must be coddled humoured supported.

When my brain has finished spewing rough stuff about the second incarnation of this project, I think I’m going to give it a break and turn back to the delicate work needed to tie up Orchestrated. Finishing that was my primary goal for this month, after all. And we all know that there’s nothing like a major primary goal to get the projects you’re not focusing on to multiply and demand attention.