Author Archives: Autumn

Thirty-Two Months Old!

Liam’s handle on language has taken yet another leap. I was sitting next to the boy while we watched a DVD the other week and realized that I was having a full-blown conversation with my son about the Muppets, complete with analysis of humour and use of similes, and we were both taking it for granted. I am just blown away by how communication evolves over the first three years.

The Muppets are very big in our house these days. He loves the opening sequence, dancing and singing along here and there, always joining in for the final line, raising his hands up in the air and saying “SHOOOOOW!” with all the Muppets on-screen. His favourite skit is Pigs In Space, which he calls “Piggies in the Spaceship”. He loves Robin and Miss Piggy, and is quite fond of Kermit. He impressed me the other night when the news anchor Muppet came on and started talking. Liam narrowed his eyes at the screen and said, “That Kermit.” I tried to explain that the person providing the newscaster’s voice was the same person who did Kermit’s voice, but it went right over his head or out into left field or something, and understandably so: Muppets are Muppets. When kids talk to them in person, they talk to the Muppet, not the person standing there holding it. Of course the puppets talk on their own; a Muppeteer is an alien concept. So I rationalized it by saying that the news anchor was Kermit in disguise. Liam looked at me, opened his mouth in a silent “Ah!” as if he had been initiated into a deep adult secret, and was satisfied.

One of the bonus features on the second season DVD set is the Weezer video of “Keep Fishing” that features some of the Muppet cast. I’d heard about the video when it was originally released in 2002 but haven’t seen it until now. Liam stood with his mouth open, his eyes riveted to the screen as the band moved from backstage at the Muppet theatre to play on the stage itself. He extended his hand in my direction, not moving his eyes from the band playing with the Muppets on-screen. “I need my cello,” he said. I got the viola out for him, and as he wouldn’t take his eyes off the action on the television we eased him into a sitting position, set it up in his lap, leaned it against his shoulder, and put the bow in his right hand. He played his cello along with the band for the rest of the video. It was terrific to see.

Lately he has really gotten into playing Hide and Seek. The only problem is that he gets so excited when he hides that when whoever is seeking him narrates their search, he responds to it. “Are you in the… bedroom?” I will say, and “Noooo!” he will exclaim from the bathroom. HRH was trying to straighten out the problem the other night and had a great time chuckling at the boy when they hid in the bathroom together, Liam bouncing up and down, hands over his mouth to keep himself quiet, and eyes wide, nearly bursting with excitement as I searched. His play has developed into a fascinating display of imagination and storytelling. Trains meet and converse and part, cars encounter difficulties and challenges and work through them. Sometimes he provides all the voices, and other times he narrates what is happening to himself or to other toys. And he’s engaging in very obvious pretending now. “Maggie is the white Totoro!” he will say. “Let’s follow her! Oh no, we can’t see her! Now she under the house!” (Poor Maggie gets cast as a wide variety of things, some of them inanimate, and is really doing a heroic job of keeping up with the exuberance of a two and a half year old who is now coordinated enough to pick her up and lug her around.) One of his current special possessions is a blue velveteen ring box that I found while clearing out a closet. “I can have this?” he said. Later I found it under the chesterfield and was going to throw it out when he grabbed it from me and said, “No, you can’t! That my game!” The implication was clear: If you won’t let me play with your Nintendo DS, I’ll make my own game, thank you very much. So we coloured dots with markers inside for buttons, and he sits on the sofa and presses them, looking at the upper ‘screen’. Over the past month it has also evolved to be his ‘computer’. It sits on his chest of drawers.

His singing of the alphabet song has become very clear, and is evidently making an impact. When he stands at the fridge door and plays with the magnetic letters he moves the A up then says, “And here the letter B!” He knows the B comes after the A. The only problem is he grabs any letter that has a vaguely similar structure such as an E, or a K, or an R. There are also tremendous potty advances being made which I haven’t been talking about for fear of jinxing things. Many are the stickers applied to weekly charts, many are the high fives. And he counted to twenty-one today, clearly and correctly, which is the highest I’ve ever heard him count.

His current favourite books are the Frog and Toad books by Arnold Lobel. I bought Frog and Toad All Year last week because I saw it in the little local book store and remembered loving it as a child. I was also getting tired of reading the same books over and over at bedtime. It enchanted Liam, who somehow suddenly knew every chapter title and could ask for them out of sequence, so I picked up two more this weekend on our Saturday runabout and gave him one that night, and the other is aside for a rainy day.

As a treat I bought blackberries at the beginning of February, intending to use them in an Imbolc ritual. He ate every single one of them over the course of the day. He was enjoying them so much that I couldn’t bring myself to tell him that he couldn’t have any more, especially when he asked for them so nicely. I figure the obvious joy he felt in eating them was a suitable offering to Brid instead. ‘Lola bars’ are also high on his list of yummy food, and I introduced sunflower seeds to him two days ago as well. He asked me today if they would grow if he planted them, “my seeds, my seeds that I put in my mouth?”

Liam can be such a funny little thing. When HRH wore an old paint-spotted shirt last weekend he got very upset: “Dada, it dirty. We clean it? We clean it for you?” With all the winter storms we’ve been having there has been major snow removal going on (although not anywhere near the frequency at which it ought to be happening), and he’s glued to the front window when the giant snowblowers and dump trucks inch down the street. He renamed his toy excavator ‘the snowblower’ and pushes it around the floor behind the matching dump truck, the scoop angled up over the dump truck like the snowblower does. He watched our next-door neighbour, who uses his big red pick-up truck for snow removal, clear our immediate neighbour’s driveway one day. “See how Pierre uses his truck to plough the snow?” HRH said. “Yes,” said Liam, watching the red truck manoeuvre in and out of the driveway. Then: “I have a truck?” “When you’re older,” said HRH, somehow keeping a straight face.

Something HRH and I started ages ago was the family hug, where Liam would nestle with one parent and the other parent would hug both. Two weeks ago HRH was saying goodnight as Liam and I were settling down for a bedtime story when Liam bounced up and said, “Family hug!” Tenderly he put one arm around my neck and the other arm around HRH’s, and we put our arms around one another and him as well, and our hearts nearly burst. We’re doing okay with this kid. He’s a good one. And we can’t wait to see how he discovers other wonderful things in the coming months and years.

Hearthcraft Book Update

Total word count, hearthcraft book: 33,394
New words today: 2,356

Hearth deities and spirits, mostly, and four pages of automatic writing (which needs to be severely rewritten and inserted in the first and second chapters) about the concept of home-based spirituality (like what it is, and why it’s important). These are what I’ve been struggling with: they’re key to the book, and I understand what they are, but it’s hard to put it into words. It’s a start.

I’ve also been copying files from my hard drive onto my new external hard drive (500 GB! — more than six times the size of my primary hard drive!) as a backup. It now houses all my music files, plus backups of my photos and all my documents. It’s been taking a long, long time, because my USB ports on the computer itself are old enough that they’re first generation, which means my super-speedy external hard drive is being restricted to the speed of the very-not-speedy old USB ports. The copying has been taking up a lot of the computer’s brain, so things have been very slow in general today. It’s taken three days overall to copy all the stuff I’ve got.

I received three books in the mail today, all of which I have been waiting for for one reason or another. Much will be the curling up to read and make notes.

Hearthcraft Book Update

Total word count, hearthcraft book: 31,038
New words today: 3,000

I would call this experiment of HRH taking the car and dropping the boy off on his way to work a success, yes?

(What I am actually screaming inside is, ‘PAST THE HALFWAY MARK! GO ME!‘)

I think we’ll try to split the driving days, so he only has to drive in twice a week and the boy doesn’t have too many nine-hour days at daycare. The caregiver has cheerfully agreed to add the boy to her regular Thursday crowd (bless her!) so I’m set for a four day writing week for the next six weeks. They won’t all be 3K days, of course. I was making a particularly determined effort today to hit the halfway mark.

More cauldron stuff, metals, fire as sacred, defining sacred and spiritual (that was first, taking a large chunk of the day, and wasn’t ultimately that much of the daily word yield, and it got me all muddled because really, how do you define that sort of thing?), and a ritual. I seem to be slogging around in the three introductory chapters, mainly because they define what the book and the path are all about, and a lot of it is vague and hard to pin down. Once they’re in some semblance of order I’ll be able to turn to the later chapters with a better footing.

Pizza as a reward tonight! As much as I would like it to be my homemade pizza I do not have meat or mushrooms for it. I’ll get some tomorrow with the general grocery order. For now, it is good order-in pizza. And I’m off to eat it!

Five Things

1. Unexpected phone calls from old friends. Doesn’t matter if you live in the same city, and talk to one another every ten days or so.

2. Hearing this particular old friend sound more relaxed and himself than has been usual.

3. New ‘imaginary friends’ – the people I only know on-line and may never meet in real life. Imaginary or not, they support me and encourage me and mean a lot to me.

4. Local friends, old and and not-so-old, who are also there for me.

5. Knowing that this fatigue thing is real and has an underlying cause, can be dealt with using a combination of medication and judicious conservation/parcelling out of energy.

6. (It’s my journal and I’ll add a sixth if I want to!) Sunlight outside, after a week or more of overcast skies and flurries.

Head, Meet Desk

Remember when I said The next time I see this should be when the Fed Ex delivery person hands me the box of page proofs?

The project manager separated the overall editor-review-edit from the copy-edit. I have to handle the copy-edit in two weeks.

I have a book to hand in a month and a half from now, a book that is going very slowly due to circumstances that are pretty much beyond my control. I may have to add an extra day to Liam’s daycare schedule every week instead of every two weeks if I’m going to lose a week to handling copy-edits.

On the somewhat more optimistic side of things, I can see the manuscript beginning to come together in some sort of odd way. It’s almost as if different portions of it are filling out or inflating into a somewhat recognisable shape, while other parts are still dead and flat. I need more of it to be alive so that I can connect more dots and deepen the exploration.

It’s not alive yet. That’s the problem. And I don’t know how to fix it. At some point it will magically happen, and then things will flow and connections will spider through the manuscript of their own accord, but until then every day is a slog uphill, pushing a ball of jumbled words and loose letters.

Friday Morning

HRH took the car today and dropped the boy at the caregiver’s for the stroke of eight, then drove to work. He’ll reverse the process tonight and pick Sparky up around the time I usually do. This is a test to see if I can get more done in a day, as my most productive time is between three and five-thirtyish. It also conserves my energy, allowing me to pour more into work instead of expending a lot of it getting the boy ready to go, doing the car thing, and coming back again. When you have a limited amount of energy before fatigue knocks you flat, toddler-wrangling and the drive takes a lot out of you. It may sound easy on paper, but living it is different. I also get into the proper headspace to write a lot faster when HRH takes the boy to his grandma’s every second Friday, so we theorized that it ought to work this way too. The main concern at the moment is how long it takes HRH to drive to work and home again afterwards. It’s against traffic both ways, but one never knows. It means an hour longer at daycare for the boy, though. We may do this two days a week and I’ll handle the other two.

So here I am, a batch of bread rising, at the computer already. This is good on my end, so far.

I did end up bowing out of rehearsal Wednesday night; I was just too exhausted. My body still hasn’t completely adjusted to the medication, so on top of the bad fibro day I was knocked out by eight o’clock. Unfortunately I woke up at midnight because Nixie was trying to dig her way out of my office, the door of which gets closed at night, and she’d accidentally been shut inside. I lay awake for two hours trying to get back to sleep, which was not good, and slept too lightly the rest of the night. I was low-key in Thursday as a result, but as Curtana and Arthur came to play it was a good relaxed morning that didn’t require too much of me. I made excellent scones (whole-wheat and honey!), the boys had a rip-roaring time together, and Curtana and I even got to talk about not-mom-things things before Liam hit his must-lunch-and-nap-now-or-never time. I slept badly last night, too. So far, the medication has given me five awesome days followed by one ungood day and a neutral day, and those last two days were mainly a result of being woken up out of the blessedly deeper sleep the medication grants me (which in turn helps alleviate some of the fibro problems). I’d say that’s a decent scorecard.

Right. To work!

Hearthcraft Book Update

Total word count, hearthcraft book: 28,038
New words today: 1,866

Morals, ethics, values, the home as sacred space. A good work day, but not such a great fibro day, I really, really hurt. I’m considering staying home from orchestra, except I know we’re missing a lot of the section today for various reasons. I’ll assume I’m going right up till the time I’d have to call the secretary. Who knows, maybe going out to get the boy will revitalize me. (Ha. I can dream.)