Monthly Archives: October 2003

muttergrumblegrr

I hate, hate, hate that my whole day can be put off by a single, small, event.

I had a terrific evening with close friends last night which involved poetry, much discussion of phobias rooted in childhood, fairy tales and nursery rhymes, Little House on the Prairie, and lots of my father’s delicious red wine. I woke up with my day all planned, and settled down to review and correct a pile of student homework.

The very first thing I picked up was a journal which began with negative response to, and criticism of, the material covered in the first two classes, and questioned the teachers’ qualifications to teach them.

It soured everything. The next two journals and sets of homework I read were fantastic, full of reflection and creative, thoughtful responses to the home exercises. If only I had picked up one of them first!

Why do we focus on the negative issues to the exclusion of the positive? Why do we remember the bad things, but not the good?

I resent the fact that this person has affected me to this extent. Logically I know that it’s a personal response, and it’s perfectly valid in a journal, but it doesn’t change the fact that it was the very first thing I read. I’m irritated because it had such an effect on me. As a result, now I’m grumpy, and nothing I seem to do snaps me out of it.

To quote a very old friend: “muttergrumblegrr.”

No, Really

I promise, promise, promise that as soon as my contracts have reached the publisher and All Is Official, I will signal the simultaneous opening of virtual champagne across North America. Then we can all drink to me and my Cool New Career. Yay me.

In the meantime I’ll chew my fingernails yet again, hoping they get to where they need to be on time.

Maybe once all that’s over with I can think about NaNo.

Myers-Briggs: Being Predictable

Because I am highly amused by this:

INFJ – “Author”. Strong drive and enjoyment to help others. Complex personality. 1.5% of total population.

Take Free Myers- Briggs Personality Test

Maybe I just hang out with author-types, but it’s same answer that Ceri scored on the test.

What I found interesting were these scores:

Introverted (I) 61.54% Extroverted (E) 38.46%
Intuitive (N) 55.26% Sensing (S) 44.74%
Feeling (F) 62.86% Thinking (T) 37.14%
Judging (J) 57.14% Perceiving (P) 42.86%

Doing a bit of research I discovered that INFJs (Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging types) typically displat traits such as, or similar to, the following:

Intuitively understand people and situations
Idealistic
Highly principled
Complex and deep
Natural leaders
Sensitive and compassionate towards people
Service-oriented
Future-oriented
Value deep, authentic relationships
Reserved about expressing their true selves
Dislike dealing with details unless they enhance or promote their vision
Constantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything
Creative and visionary
Intense and tightly-wound
Can work logically and rationally – use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it

Apparently, [t]hey need to feel as if everything they do in their lives is in sync with their strong value systems – with what they believe to be right. Accordingly, the INFJ should choose a career in which they’re able to live their daily lives in accordance with their deeply-held principles, and which supports them in their life quest to be doing something meaningful. Hey, that sounds kind of familiar…

And what’s right at the top of the career list for INFJ-types? Clergy / Religious Work, directly followed by Teachers. A couple lower we find Alternative Health Care Practitioners, Counselors and Social Workers, and Musicians and Artists.

So nice to know I’m pursuing paths generally considered rewarding for my personality type. And yet… not so nice to be this predictable. (That’s probably an INFJ thing too, I’ll bet.)

INFJ is apparently the rarest personality type, coming in at a whopping 2% of the population. Read all about ’em here, and here too.

Ego Boost

I was offered a place in a second orchestra last night. Nothing says “You’re more talented than you think you are” like someone else asking you to come in to support a weak cello section, let me tell you. Autumn to the rescue!

Interestingly enough, Cantabile was founded by my current LCO conductor, Douglas Knight, though it’s been led by Peter Willsher for a few years now. Go figure.

Cantabile is a choral group with a full orchestra. On November 15 in a Lachine they’re performing Puccini’s Messa di Gloria and Elgar’s Enigma Variations. Since this is rescue operation, I don’t know whether I’ll stay on full-time, especially as rehearsals overlap a bit with the class I teach on Sundays. However, for the three weeks until the concert, I can be flexible.

The odd part is that the choir is peppered with people I used to sing with about ten years ago. It’s going to be a bit awkward, I think. I’m a very different person, I use a different name, and, well, I’m not as mousy and tremblingly polite as I used to be. I probably still be polite, of course. It won’t be the same, though. Am I making sense? I’m a whole decade older; I like to think I’ll be comfortable enough to walk away and enjoy being by myself as opposed to empowering others by being a patronised audience.

In all likelihood l’m being very uncharitable, and they’ll all probably be delighted to see me. Besides, I’m focusing more on the fact that this is going to be an excellent test of my sight-reading; there are only three regular rehearsals before the concert, after all.