Category Archives: Diary

The Birthday Post

I am now in that limbo between forty and the answer to everything.

It was a quiet birthday. We’re all rubbing against one another uncomfortably here at home; no one is used to having all four family members home all the time for more than three days in a row, and we don’t know what to do with ourselves. The day started off very nicely, and then we kind of got irritated with one another, but it ended nicely again. We had sushi as a birthday treat, and Owlet devoured a kappa maki and Sparky decided that he liked sake sashimi (which he has liked on again and off again since he was three… mostly off again). Now I am excited, because this means we can go out for sushi together and everyone can eat something.

The birthday may have been quiet in person, but online there was a riot of birthday wishes and greetings in forums and through Twitter and Facebook and via e-mail. It took me ages to read through them all, in several sittings. Thank you again, everyone!

My birthday is also my parents’ wedding anniversary. My rudimentary math skills tell me that as I was born on their fourth wedding anniversary, they have now been married for forty-five years.

I had an early birthday dinner with my in-laws before they left for a month on holiday in Cape Breton, which was lovely. They gave me a teacup and saucer that had been owned by HRH’s maternal grandmother, and I had my tea in it the very next morning. I love gifts like that, that come with meaning and history. They also donated to my Saving Up for an iPad 2 fund. My parents sent me money for the same fund (and blew me away with their generosity!), and HRH and the kids also gave me a gift certificate toward it. I am over halfway there already. I want to get it before I leave for my conference on the first weekend of August, because then I will be able to Skype with the kids each night. The Windows laptop that could handle Skypeing is now dead, the old iBook that is a glorified typewriter can’t run the program or load the web-based interface, and my iPhone doesn’t have a front camera.

The iPad is the result of a long research- gathering and decision-making process. It was evident that I needed an alternate work computer. I use my iPhone all the time via wi-fi through the day, and I also wanted a larger e-reader where I wouldn’t be turning a page every five seconds. I liked and coveted the iPad, which answered most of my needs, but I couldn’t justify it since I couldn’t use it for editing, which is the majority of my work. Track Changes is my main tool, and iPad apps didn’t handle it. If I needed a backup unit to work with while travelling or if my desktop went down again (please no, not any time soon, or ever again, really), then investing in a computer-like thing that couldn’t be used for work was pointless. So I kept looking at small laptops half-heartedly, which would let me work but not provide an easy e-reading experience or the casual online messing about and communicating I enjoy doing. It was starting to look like I’d have to buy two separate units, and if I was being responsible (and that was essential, because money has been really, really bad) it would have to be the laptop first. And frankly, that made me cranky, because I wanted the fun thing first, after a couple of years of making do in pretty much every area of life.

At least… the iPad apps couldn’t handle Track Changes editing until a couple of months ago, when app developers began to provide the Track Changes function in response to the demands of users. And when I discovered that, my dilemma was solved, and the iPad was a go! I decided that I’d ask for money and gift certificates for my birthday, and when my paycheque from my first freelance job after a year off came in, I’d make up whatever was left and buy one. I’ve got the Bluetooth mini Apple keyboard that came with my first Mac mini to pair with it, so I’m not limited by the touch keyboard if I do work on it. Now my last decision is whether to go for the black one, to minimize the grunge-collection, or go with the white, which will blend in with the documents and books I’ll be reading and working with. And what kind of case I’ll get for it, of course.

We enjoyed a lovely dinner with Eric yesterday at his new house. All aspects of the visit were lovely, and future visits will be even lovelier when Soo and Ro move up to join him next week. The evening ended with cheesecake, of which I am not a fan, but this one changed my mind. Not only that, he sent me home with the remaining 3/4 of the cake. I don’t know if this is a universal un-disliking of the cheesecake genre, or just of this one particular kind from this specific bakery, but I’ll take it! I have disliked cheesecake mostly for its (a) leaden texture and (b) the heavy taste of cream cheese, a food I don’t like. This one was feathery light, tasted of butter and cream, and was more like a mousse with only the faintest nuance of cheese. A fabulous thick graham crust, a light cheese layer that had the texture of a heavenly vanilla sponge cake, and heavy whipped cream on top of the cheese layer with a pile of seasonal fruit and sliced almonds along the sides… really, it was divine. And the sausages he grilled for supper (particularly the broccoli-cheese ones) along with the watermelon-feta salad… I think I ate from the moment we got there till the moment we left, either grazing while we prepped food or formally partaking of supper. And that includes eating the tiny apples off the trees in his backyard, with fruit so sweet and somehow fizzy that they tasted like apple candy.

And finally… seven years ago yesterday, Sparky came home from the hospital to properly start life with us as a family. The middle of July is full of celebration in my family, and I am thankful for all of it.

Owlet: Eleven Months Old!

Someone has turned into a walking, talking, eating machine!

Yes, we have walking, although Owlet prefers to still hold onto things to get around. She has taken casual solo steps here and there, up to two or three at a time. One day, walking with stiffer legs so that she doesn’t collapse like a wet noodle just kind of clicked. She does a great job of ambling along beside someone, holding on to a finger. She’s also mastered the art of crouching down to get something and standing back up again without pulling herself up, and of getting to her feet from a sitting position unassisted. The coordination required is just amazing, and it’s incredible to watch the constant readjusting of balance and position so that she doesn’t fall over. It’s particularly impressive when she does it on our bed, which is a non-solid surface and requires even more constant balance adjustment. She walks everywhere there’s something to hold on to, only getting down to crawl if the gap is too big to cross by stretching her arm out to grab the next solid object. She’ll stand casually next to a table or shelf if she wants to use both hands. She can get down off the chesterfield on her own, too, by getting onto her tummy and wriggling her legs back over the edge of the seat, then sliding down on her own. If she’s walking holding on to someone’s hand (or being carried) she’ll point to direct us to where she wants to go next.

The talking is finally happening more. I will admit, I knew Sparky was an early talker (and a late walker) so I wasn’t counting on words too early, but even so, I was watching Owlet with a bit of anxiety because she didn’t seem interested in mimicking sounds. Well, that slammed into gear this month. She can now repeat sounds if she’s in the right headspace. “What does the sheep say?” I asked her again one day. (Actually, in Owlet’s world, everything that isn’t a cat or a dog says “baa.”) “Aa,” she said. “Baa,” I corrected her. She looked at me and thought for a moment, then said, “Buh–aa” so carefully. Pointing made its debut this past month, along with the word “Da?”, so we’re giving her news words all the time at her own request. New words include up, more, book (boh), bugs (buh), tiger (tiya), that (da), up, meow, uh-oh, oopsie, cheese (shee). She was chewing on Sparky’s hat the other day, then held it out to us and said, “Eeyahn!” before smiling and hugging it. She uses certain words consistently, like Mama, Dada, ba (bottle), meh (milk), and ca (cat). Her comprehension is developing independently of her spoken language, too. She knows what “Drink your milk!” means: it means ‘stop looking around and get back to nursing,’ and she does so when I say it. She knows what “Do you want some milk?” means, too; it means we’re going to sit down and nurse. “Do you want a cracker?” makes her grin and huff with delight and make a beeline for the pantry (which she can now open and pull out the cracker box, yikes).

As for food… good grief. The problem is slowing her down, she is so enthusiastic about it. We’ve made some progress using utensils. The fork works better than the spoon, but is still problematic because there’s a big ball on the end of the handle, which is much more attractive to put in one’s mouth than the food on the other end. Using drier food seems to help, too; goopy stuff like oatmeal doesn’t work as well when she practices. We found a secondhand wooden high chair in the local classifieds (IKEA stopped making these somewhere around Christmas, right after we decided we’d wait to buy it, grr) so we can pull her right up to the table now just like the rest of us, which delights her to no end.

We discovered that she is a monster for garden strawberries. Sparky and I picked the first ones on a sunny day in early June, and I bit some off and gave it to her. Then she promptly tried to climb me to get the rest. Halfway through June we sat next to the garden and ate our way through handfuls of them. She loves them so much. Actually, I don’t yet know of a food she doesn’t like. She adores eating, and I’m enjoying it while it lasts. All too soon I know the beige diet — chicken, pasta, bread, potatoes — will hit. New foods this month include lasagna, hot dogs, hamburgers, homemade granola bars, kiwi, oranges, and a taste of vanilla ice cream! That went over so well she kept banging the table every time I dipped my spoon into my bowl so I’d give her more.

The big food-related news is the introduction of cow’s milk. A couple of nights ago after our baby velociraptor had stuffed herself with her heaping bowl of pasta, mixed veg, and cheese, she polished off her sippy cup of water and then started pointing at everyone else’s drinks and making the “gimmee” grabby hand sign for more. Ron said, “Do you want some milk like Liam?” So I shrugged, got a different sippy cup out of the cupboard (the one made like the bottles we’ve been using), put two ounces of milk in it and handed it to her to see what would happen. And she guzzled it back with delight. So, er, no adjustment issues there. I’ll give her a couple of ounces per day and see how she does, but not replace anything with it yet.

Books are finally interesting… still to chew, but now to sit and turn pages, too. One of her favourite pastimes is pulling her board books off the various shelves we’ve put them on for her to sort through, and sitting amid the pile to page through them. It’s a relief to finally be able to sit and read to her. The books do have to be board books, and there can only be a few words on each page because she is very enthusiastic about flipping pages (forward or backward, it matters not), but it’s a huge stride forward from before when she wouldn’t sit for books at all.

About halfway through June we took the twin bed I’d been sleeping in out of her room, and moved all her furniture back to where we’d originally planned to put it. She’d been waking up only once a night after about eight hours of sleep for a brief nursing session, so we felt safe in moving me back downstairs where I can respond to the monitor, and she doesn’t panic if it makes me an extra minute or two to get to her. It’s nice to be back in my own bed, although I miss being with her, too. Starting the last week of June she slept all through the night, but her daytime naps promptly went screwy. When she wakes up on her own, she’ll read her cloth books that are in the corner of her bed, and it’s fun hear her talking to herself as she explores flaps and crinkly pages. She can entertain herself for twenty minutes like that.

These days her schedule sort of looks like this: She wakes around 6:00, naps from 8:30/9:00 for an hour to an hour and a half, lunches at noon, naps again from 12:30/1:00 for another hour to hour and a half, supper is at 6:00, then bed is around 6:30. If she misses a nap or they’re cut short by teething or whathaveyou, she often has a catch-up catnap around 4:00 to 5:00, and then bedtime is a bit later, between 7:00 and 7:30. And she’s starting to sleep round the clock till 6:00ish the next morning. Lately there has been a middle of the night wakeup again, but she either self-soothes back to sleep or just needs her back patted and her soother found, or a cuddle.

We’re at an awkward stage during the day. We can’t let her play alone, because she’s mobile and at the into-everything stage. (My wheel has a child lock thorough the spokes now, and has been relegated to the front entryway which we don’t use; she’s still determined to get into it, though.) I can’t just sit with her; she demands full attention, which drains me. So we kind of go back and forth between the two, although I am trying to teach her to entertain herself while I bake or tidy or do laundry. Her favourite toys are paper catalogues. (Eating paper is one of her pastimes, much to our frustration.) She still loves to jump and bounce. Coasters are among her preferred things to gnaw on. Knocking down block towers is a great new game, as is rolling balls back and forth. I bought her a cloth doll to see if something with a human face would grab her attention as a lovey more than a stuffed animal, and we had great success; she loves it with a fierce passion. We show it to her and she absolutely lights up, reaches her hands out for it and bounces or giggles, then crushes it to her chest with more wiggles of delight once it’s in her hands. Then she usually stuffs it in her mouth, because she’s teething, but when she’s quiet she often holds it in her lap and looks at the doll’s face, stroking it and playing with the yarn hair. She called it “Fff,” so I named it Evie, and now she can say that, too (although it does come out as “Eeefee.”). I need to buy a second identical one and switch them back and forth, because after only two or three weeks this one has a certain sour aroma and needs a wash.

Her first big party kind of outing was this past Canada Day and my concert. She adored the parade, kicked her legs and clapped for the bagpipes as they went by (much to her father’s delight), and kicked her legs and tried to sing along at the concert, too, so HRH had to take her outside. But she is so social that the entire night was fun for her.

Tooth #8 finally arrived, the second lateral incisor on the lower right. She keeps stuffing her fingers along the left back of her jaw; we think her first-year molars may be starting to grumble deep in the depths of her gums.

She is wearing size 4 in disposable diapers (we had to start using one at night because she feels the wet in the cloth ones too easily and it wakes her up completely in the middle of the night when she gets to the surface of a sleep cycle; the disposable lets her go back to sleep), her shoe size is something like size 4 or 5 (I have no real idea, as she hasn’t worn real shoes yet, just the soft leather ones), and in general she is still wearing 18-24 mos clothes. Her face, trunk, and arms are slimming out with all this new activity, while her legs still solid and adorably chunky-fat.

Yesterday I saw Owlet toddle by under her own steam holding a small sippy cup of cow’s milk (now a treat), pause, tilt it back to drink, and then keep going on her way. Our baby is perilously close to toddlerhood, and only one month away from a year old.

Canada Day Concert Reminder!

What? Canada Day approacheth? Why then, the Lakeshore Chamber Orchestra Canada Day concert must be nigh!

On Sunday July 1 the Lakeshore Chamber Orchestra will be giving a free (yes, free!) concert as part of the overall Canada Day celebrations in conjunction with Pointe-Claire Village. We do this every year, and it’s always terrific fun. Our conductor is the justly famed Stewart Grant, who is phenomenal.

This year’s programme has a Northern theme and features music from Scandinavian, Russian, and Canadian composers:

    Glinka: Russlan & Ludmilla overture
    Borodin: Symphony no. 3
    Grant: Chaconne
    Grieg: Peer Gynt
    Sibelius: Finlandia

The concert begins at 20h00. As always, this Canada Day concert is being presented at St-Joachim church in Pointe-Claire Village, located right on the waterfront at 2 Ste-Anne Street, a block and a half south of Lakeshore Road. The 211 bus from Lionel-Groulx metro drops you right at the corner of Sainte-Anne and Lakeshore. Here’s a map to give you a general idea. I usually encourage those facing public transport to get together and coax a vehicle-enabled friend along by offering to buy them an ice cream or something. It works nicely, and it’s fun to go with a group. And hey, you can’t beat the price. Be aware that if you’re driving, parking will be at a premium because of the whole Canada Day festivities thing going on. Give yourself extra time to find a parking place and walk to the church, which will be packed with people.

As it’s a holiday, the village will be full of various celebrations, booths, food stalls, and the like. You might want to come early and enjoy what’s going on.

Free classical music! Soul-enriching culture! And as an enticing bonus, the fireworks are scheduled for ten PM, right after we finish, and the church steps are a glorious spot from which to watch them. Write it on your calendar, tell all your friends and family members! The more the merrier!

(If you need more enticement, there will be a certain little girl in attendance. It will be her first concert. That means we won’t be staying for the fireworks this year, though; we’re going to need to leave ASAP, as it will be way, way past her bedtime and we have a forty-five minute drive home.)

Yesterday, Things Went Wrong

It could have been worse, of course, but:

1. The phone line, which was supposedly fixed, went dead again yesterday. And then came back this morning. Then it was dead again. And now it’s back up again, but for how long?

2. My printer is officially also dead, which means I need to buy another new one. I’ve tried everything I can to get it back on its feet. Although this one lasted me two years and worked wonderfully when it was operational, so I shouldn’t grumble too much. I seem to replace them every two to five years, and while that seems horribly wasteful to me, it’s probably the lifespan of what’s made these days. (Which disappoints me on a whole other level. I don’t like thinking of small appliances and electronics as disposable.)

3. The new umbrella stroller I bought yesterday at half price to replace our old tatty one (a canopy! reclinable!) was missing two wheels, and I didn’t discover it until I unpacked it after dragging it and the baby in our other stroller home. So I have to take it back again today.

4. My rickety Windows laptop finally bit the dust. It won’t even boot up now.

So I baked chocolate shortbread bunnies. They were very good. And I made veggie-cheese nuggets and froze them for quick Owlet meals, but it took great strength on my part not to eat them all myself.

General PSAs

1. Our phone voice line is officially on the fritz after being dicky for the past two weeks, and Bell can’t open a help ticket because they’re experiencing technical difficulties. (Fills me with confidence, that does.) Our internet is still functional. If you need to get hold of us, please use e-mail (or a Twitter DM or Facebook message if you’re on either of those, since notifications for those go to my e-mail as well).

2. The Canada Day concert is rapidly approaching: July 1 at 8:00 PM, in St-Joachim church in Pointe-Claire village. It’s free! It’s fun! Come early and enjoy the festivities in the village, and stay for the fireworks after the show!

3. One week left of school. Gods help us.

4. No reply yet from the magazine to whom I submitted an application for the position of part-time editor last Friday. I am totally not stressing. Totally not.

5. Happy Father’s Day weekend to all the dads out there!

Recital Post-Mortem

That went well!

When we last left our cellists, we were prepping for the end of year recital, and I was feeling neutral about my piece, which was about as good as I could feel when I’d been working on it with no guidance for four or five months. The last two lessons were full of things going wrong (everything falling apart is an important part of the constructive process, I know, but it’s no fun when it happens and certainly not seven to ten days before a performance, because reconstruction and mental rewiring usually takes longer than that), and my rehearsal with the accompanist was mostly a disaster with a couple of acceptable patches. By that point I had pretty much accepted that whatever happened happened, and as long as I muddled through it and came out somewhat alive then I’d be okay with it. Now, that’s a huge step forward for me, because usually I worry and worry and worry. This time, I knew that I’d had months off, and if my performance reflected that, well then, that was fair. I was also more concerned about Sparky, who was being more sensitive than usual about performing his piece. (If such a thing is possible, because he angsts about it every time.)

Sparky played second, and he did very well indeed, keeping a steady rhythm and remembering to keep a high third and fourth finger so that his F# and G were in tune, and to reach back to get his E in tune as well. He played a pre-Twinkle piece called “The Little Mouse,” which ends in a squeaky bit played on the string between the bridge and the tailpiece that he just loves to do. I was near the end, and I went in with pretty much zero expectations. I wasn’t entirely happy with how thin the sound was at the beginning, but around the third line of the first page things kind of clicked and I sailed through all the trouble spots and even sounded good. If I ever see the video I’m sure I’ll be embarrassed at how incredulously thrilled I looked at the end when I’d done and I looked at both my teacher and my accompanist.

So that’s the end of Suzuki book 3. Due to both my and my teacher’s schedules we can’t fit in another lesson this month, and we’re both taking the summer off, so that’s it till September. Now I get to start working on book 4 and the Breval sonata, which I played in its entirety with my first teacher; it was my first public recital piece, in fact. And I get to do some swotting up on the orchestra pieces, since the Canada Day concert is in only two weeks.

Owlet: Ten Months Old!

I will never again doubt my mother’s claim that I did everything at nine months — walking, talking, complicated piano riffs (no, not really) — because this past month has been an explosion of development for Owlet.

In the Big Achievements department, she can now:

• Drink from her own handle-less 10-oz sippy cup (which is filled to the brim with water when we give it to her, and she usually drains one every day, sometimes more)
• Clap with actual open hands, not knocking the knuckles of her fists together.
• Crawl! We have real crawling, with all four limbs moving in sequence! Her tummy even lifts off the floor for about half the endeavour! Though she often goes back to the baby army crawl because she can move faster that way. And if she has her druthers, she’d rather be standing, thank you very much. As a matter of fact, she’ll insist on it.
• Hover, as in stand on her own for a few seconds while she lets go of one piece of furniture or hand and reaches for another.
• Cruise around a room with ease, going from bookcase to loveseat to end table to coffee table to chair to cedar chest. I draw the line at the spinning wheel.
• Stand next to someone holding only one hand, and even take a few steps that way.
• Stand for a few moments on her own, usually because she doesn’t notice she’s let go with both hands.
• Stand on her own, not touching anything, and drink from her sippy cup (yeah, this one really freaked us out). We’ve gone from a couple of seconds of hands-free hovering, to standing unassisted, while tilting the sippy cup back to drink from it. I don’t think she realized that she didn’t have a hip resting against the edge of the coffee table, as she usually does. It kind of blew my mind: she had her head way back, with both hands on the sippy cup and elbows up and cocked out, and she didn’t even wobble.

And…

• WALK. It’s only a shaky step or two at this point if she’s on her own, but if she’s holding on to someone’s fingers she motors along with great determination. And she doesn’t hang her weight from your hands either; she’s on her own feet and she lightly uses you as balance when she needs it. HRH built beautiful wooden baby gates in the style of the attic railing (true hinged gates that open and close at the top of each staircase), and they came at the precisely correct time.

Owlet won’t. sit. down. It’s all standing, all the time, or there is shrieking and arching the back and throwing herself around. She loves to stand at one of the little play stations we’ve set up on end tables or low shelves for her. The play stations have a mix of blocks, books, small shaky toys or stuffed critters. I keep trying to teach her the put-things-in-other-things skill, but she’s still too delighted with the taking-things-out-of-other-things part. There’s a big cognitive jump between the two. Books are suddenly more than chew toys (although that is still their primary purpose): they open and close, and flipping pages is lots of fun. She got a wooden swing this past month, and has therefore been introduced to swinging, which, judging from the cascade of throaty giggles, she adores.

In the realm of teeth, she’s up to seven, four on top and three below. She’s working on her eighth, the lower right second incisor, and is utterly miserable right now. This poor kid can’t get a break. It has to slow down at some point. Seven within two months? I don’t remember Sparky’s coming that fast.

Owlet’s eyes have gone a beautiful grey-blue, and her hair is coming in nicely. It’s long enough at the sides to start sticking out over her ears in funny little swoops, and at the bottom to start hinting at clumping into thin little waves. It’s still an indeterminate colour, but it’s got a lot of red to it for now. (Red tones and waves… to no one’s surprise, I’m sure.) Her skin is so fair that it turns red about five minutes after we go outside, even when we’ve slathered her in SPF 50 sunscreen and she’s in the shade. I’ve concluded that it’s a response to the heat. She grew out of the awesome little denim bucket hat someone passed along to us, and Nana brought her a new floppy wide-brimmed white eyelet hat this past weekend that we call her chapeau. It covers so much more of her neck and shoulders.

New foods include toast and raspberry jam, salmon, scones, orzo, baby corn, garlic shoots, edamame… I’ve lost track. Pretty much anything except nut products, shellfish, and berries, really. She is so incredibly enthusiastic about food that she wants whatever anyone is eating, and doesn’t turn anything away. We haven’t done cow’s milk yet; still holding off on it. Maybe next month. She’s using that sippy cup like a pro for drinking water, though, after having so much trouble with them. You know what did it? Buying her a sippy cup without handles. We were using two kinds of handled ones, but all she did was get hung up on the handles, either by chewing them or getting them tangled up in her hands. I suspect they stuck out too far and needed too much fine motor control to adjust the cup so that the spout was at the right angle. I bought these Tommee Tippee ones instead, and the very day we got it she had it tipped up to drink from it. The cup is much more secure and doesn’t wobble, since she’s holding it right between her palms.

And oh, the talking. After worrying a bit, she seems to have suddenly switched to the vocal development track after working so hard on the physical development one. So far, the words she uses are: cat, Dada, Mama, mi (milk), mo (more), mmm (her yummy sound), booh (book), awl (owl), beh (bell). She has said “eh” (not “aay” but a short e) and “yeah” for a while now, using them as greetings or general comment. The other day Sparky called her name and she said, “Yeah?” And then they did it again, which was fantastic. She has an interesting “ee-AH” sound for her brother, which is odd; I’d have thought it would be “EE-ah,” echoing the syllabic emphasis of his name. It is also entirely possible she said “nana” and “amma” when her grandmothers were here.

Sleep is slowly approaching something like reliable. About an hour to two hours of nap both morning and afternoon. Generally she’ll go to bed around 7, wake anywhere between one and four, nurse then sleep again, and wake up around 6:30 for the day. That’s a rough average, of course. There are nights where she’s miserable from teething or a cold or the bloody cats wake her up, or the wind changes, or whatever. (Like now. Now we have the ‘shriek and fuss for ninety minutes before finally sleeping, no matter what Mum and Dad do’ thing happening. So much fun.)

She’s figured out dancing! She holds onto the edge of the coffee table and bobs up and down with a ginormous grin on her face. She watched someone drumming on Sesame Street one morning and started banging the table in response, so there’s that connection, too. When we sing to her she sometimes “sings” back with “ah ah ah ah”s. She’s loving Sparky just as much as ever, too. She toddles into his room, dragging whoever is walking with her behind her, and explores his books, toys, and bed, whether he is there or not (if he is, it’s an exciting bonus). He has played with her properly at least once a week, making up games around her and her toys. They danced to the radio one day, which was priceless:

Nursing is leveling off, of her own accord. She is very busy, you see, much too busy to curl up and have some milk. She much prefers standing at the coffee table and munching diced apple or rice rusks. And if she is game for milk we need to pay close attention to the latch, or her sharp little teeth make things uncomfortable. She’s making the sessions she does have shorter, too. Whereas they used to be ten to fifteen minutes, now they’re five to eight. Plus we have also attained the nursing gymnastics level, where baby wants to wiggle and roll and move around while drinking, and when you’ve got 23 pounds of enthusiastic baby trying to multitask, well, it’s frustrating and uncomfortable. I’ve ended nursing sessions because she’s climbing around, and she hasn’t seemed upset yet. I’m bruised and sore from the toes dug into the ribs and abdomen as she climbs over me, I’ve cut another two inches off my hair to reduce the amount of yanking, and I grit my teeth against the pinching when she tries to grab my clothes and gets the skin underneath as well. I forgot how all-or-nothing babies are; they do everything full-tilt, because they have no governors yet.

And full-tilt is her default setting. She wants to do All The Things All The Time, unless it involves sitting quietly. If she has distraction and stimulation, she is thrilled. If she has me, I get boring very quickly. In purely selfish realm, I wish she was more of a cuddler. I have a baby who yanks and pulls and head butts and jabs – all in enthusiasm, I must add, not maliciousness. Instead of cuddles, there are struggles. I’m hoping she mellows somewhat, because I’m a cuddler myself, and the only time I get to cuddle her a bit is when she nurses… which is, of course, becoming rarer. She’s growing up, the way babies do.